I had, at the end of yesterday, decided I would continue with my ragged tale of woe, and update everyone on all the continued nastiness, of this “trip from hell”, but I have changed my mind.  Going on and on about all the things that have gone wrong since I arrived here Sunday, isn’t going to make any of them better, get me home any sooner, or make anyone feel any better about me being here, including me.  I am in a part of the country that I have never been in before, surrounded by very nice people, who are extremely friendly, even when turning me down.  I am going to have to work harder than I had anticipated.  I am going to have to walk, a lot.  I am going to be physically and emotionally drained when I go home.  I am going to have spent a lot more money than I ever should have to, on the job.  And, at some point, in the not too distance future, I am going to laugh about a whole lot of this, and chalk it up to experience.  It will be an experience, hopefully, that will prove me to be stronger than I would have imagined.

I have decided to change my attitude.  I will do my job, to the best of my ability, and ignore the temptation to worry about numbers.  The company mislead me in the potential there was here for big sales numbers, and I have determined there is no chance of me doing the numbers I had expected, of myself.  I will work 5-5 1/2 hours, and no more.  I will not push my body to do any more when I still have to walk back and forth to the hotel, postal outlet and restaurants.  I will save and submit every receipt, and hope they are smart enough to cover all my costs, or this will be my grounds to start updating my resume.  There, I said it.  I set my expectations of myself far higher than I should sometimes, and I beat myself up when I don’t achieve.  I am not doing that any more.  I may need people to remind me I have said this, but I am fully giving my permission to anyone who reads this, to call me on it.

I cried a million tears in the first 48 hours I was in this territory, and I am not doing that any more.  I am going to smile and tell myself, when things start to get to me, that this is really a drop in the bucket that is my lifetime of moments.  I will search for the positive moments between now and Sunday, and cherish them.  I have great friends who I know are following my escapades, and sending me lots of positive energy and prayers, and for that I will rejoice, and be eternally grateful.  I truly appreciate each and every one of you who have sent me messages, read my ramblings, and even called.  It really does make it better.